No one Knows it all.

 Are you the kind of person who is always right?
What does the Bible say about this?

Those who think they know something do not yet know as they ought to know.
But whoever loves God is known by God. 1 Cor 8:2–3 NIV

The apostle John said of Jesus that he was full of grace and truth.

The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. Jn 1:14 NIV

Truth is so important. Bible knowledge is essential because the Bible is God's Word.

But if Bible knowledge is your first priority, if you think your assignment from God is to always rebuke Christians who think differently, where is your humility? Where is your love for your neighbour?

John didn't say Jesus was filled with truth and grace. He said Jesus was filled with grace and truth.

Grace and truth, not truth and grace.

What did Paul say about Christians with different opinions?

Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarrelling over disputable matters.
One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables.

The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them.

Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.

One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. Rom 14:1–5 NIV

Perhaps you are a trained Bible teacher with excellent spiritual gifts. You have a calling as a pastor or church leader.

But be careful! Being opinionated is not a virtue. Know-it-all attitude does not come from God!

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 1 Cor 13:2 NIV

Do you always know better?

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 1 Cor 13:9 NIV

Here Paul includes himself, confessing that he did not know it all.

But maybe you're not a trained church leader, but your pastor or an elder behaves like an infallible pope. You are not obliged to always give in.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Gal 5:1 NIV

If the leaders in your church or denomination are dictatorial, if they demand unconditional submission, if they always put you down when you express your own thoughts, then just leave ...

But Paul himself could also be very harsh and dogmatic. He was particularly tough on legalism and lawlessness. Some thorny issues are important and others are not so important. We need the wisdom that only comes from God.

But if you experience bullying in a church, just leave ...

Paul himself admonished Christians not to give in to spiritual dictatorship.

In fact, you even put up with anyone who enslaves you or exploits you or takes advantage of you or puts on airs or slaps you in the face. 2 Cor 11:20 NIV

Healing from Spiritual Abuse

 I was 24 years old and I was a lost soul. I somehow believed in Jesus, but I was torn by so many doubts. I sought help for my depression with a good therapist, but he couldn't eliminate my existential fears.  

I attended a church where I learnt a humanistic worldview, but I wasn't convinced in my heart.

I attended a yoga class, but I didn't find an eternal reality there.
I visited a fanatical sect and my confusion only got worse.

Traumatised, I finally sought help from my cousin, a loving, Bible-believing Christian.
I attended a church with her where I heard a powerful testimony from a preacher who had been persecuted for years in a communist prison and had remained faithful.

I was determined to believe in Jesus and the Bible. That was the beginning of my new life with God.

But not everything went smoothly. The leaders of this church were seemingly flawless like the apostle Paul, but unfortunately that was not the case.

The pastors wanted to tightly control everyone. I wasn't supposed to see my therapist anymore. I was supposed to fast and pray and fast and pray.

It was all too much for me and I broke down.

I was cast out as an unreconstructed sinner and I had a complete nervous breakdown.

But Jesus never rejected or condemned me. Jesus loves the weak and wounded sheep that some preachers despise and cast out.

If you want to understand this, you can find similar stories in the New Testament.

Jesus healed a man who was blind from birth. He gave his testimony but the Pharisees did not want to believe that Jesus had healed him, but the healed man would not give in. He dared to contradict the Pharisees and they excommunicated him from the Jewish community.

Jesus heard that they had thrown him out, and when he found him, he said, “Do you believe in the Son of Man?”

“Who is he, sir?” the man asked. “Tell me so that I may believe in him.”

Jesus said, “You have now seen him; in fact, he is the one speaking with you.”
Then the man said, “Lord, I believe,” and he worshipped him. Jn 9:35–38 NIV

In the following chapter, Jesus explains that he is the Good Shepherd who wants to save the misunderstood and rejected sheep.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.
“I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep. Jn 10:10–11 NASB95

No matter how people have abused you, you are no less loved by Jesus.

Jesus is speaking to you now.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Mt 11:28 NASB95

The Wrong Cross

 In a dream, I saw a Christian hanging on a cross.

I don't remember any other details except that the Christian had experienced disappointing results in his efforts to serve God.

What was the reason for this lack of success? The words in my dream were as clear as the sun in the sky.
‘The wrong cross!’

The Christian was nailed to a cross, but it was not ordained by God. What could that mean?

I didn't see anything more concrete in the dream, and God didn't speak directly to me about it, but as I thought about the message, many real-life stories came to mind.

Both the Lord Jesus and the Apostle Paul taught that celibacy is a calling and a gift from God that is only given to some people. Paul was celibate, but most of the apostles, including Peter, were married.

Yet there are some churches that require all ordained ministers to be celibate. We regularly read about sex scandals in the media. Obviously, celibacy is ‘the wrong cross’ for many people.

There are also churches where you are supposed to get married. You are even told who to marry and who not to marry.

Many Christian women see their husbands criminally assaulting their own children or abusing them with porn or incest. When such women protest, they are often not believed by church leaders or are told it is their own fault for not being a sexually satisfying wife.

They are often told that it is a sin to leave their husband. ‘God hates divorce’ for whatever reason. If these women submit to this torture, they are on the ‘wrong cross’.

There are women who are taught that contraception is a sin and that they must give birth to as many children as possible.

They are on ‘The Wrong Cross’.

There are women who are taught that they must always obey their husbands unconditionally. They are not free to serve God as disciples who receive their calling and guidance directly from God.

They are on the ‘wrong cross’.

There are women who are taught that they are not allowed to preach or teach. Many are called and gifted by God to do what their pastors or husbands forbid.

Many of these women are on the ‘Wrong Cross’.

Many Christians are taught that submission to the leaders of their church is their first duty. Leaving their church or joining another church is sin. They must sacrifice their dreams for their own lives and ministry in order to serve the vision of the head pastor.

This can lead to a life of passive religiosity. They are not allowed to think for themselves or express opinions other than those of their leaders.

These people are at the ‘wrong cross’.

I know a pastor whose people call him ‘Papa’.

Some say you should never hold your pastor accountable because a pastor is like Moses who was accountable to no one but God.

What did Jesus say?

“But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers.
And do not call anyone on earth ‘father,’ for you have one Father, and he is in heaven. Mt 23:8–9 NIV

There are Christians who are taught that God uses sickness to purify us through suffering. Many people suffer from sickness because they believe they are glorifying God.

They are on the ‘wrong cross’.

There is only one cross that deals with sickness, the cross of Jesus Christ.

That evening they brought to him many who were possessed with demons; and he cast out the spirits with a word, and cured all who were sick.

This was to fulfil what had been spoken through the prophet Isaiah, “He took our infirmities and bore our diseases.” Mt 8:16–17 NRSV

When I read the Gospels, I see that Jesus is the healer, not the tormentor.
There are Christians who have been abused or mistreated for years. They develop a victim mentality, paralysed by false humility, bitterness or self-hatred. Jesus lived, died and rose again to set you free.

Please don't stay on the ‘wrong cross’.

Mercy and Judgement

 A man took two dogs for a walk. When both dogs were disobedient, he chastised both dogs. He gave one dog a pretty hard punch on the nose, but he only scolded the other dog in a sharp voice.

A passer-by asked him why he was being so unfair. Surely he should treat both dogs equally. The man with the dogs replied that he loved both dogs, but they had different temperaments.

There are some people who never take God seriously except to hear harsh talk about the flames of hell. There are others who respond humbly when they hear only a gentle message about God's love and holiness.

There are those who have been deeply hurt by bullying from the pulpit. Even though they sometimes need to hear about God's holiness, they cannot endure harsh speech without feeling intimidated by the preacher or by God Himself.

There are Christians who need to hear harsh sermons often, and others who need God's gentle reassurance again and again.

There are Christians who have been so hurt by many harsh sermons that they overreact until they no longer want to endure the clear biblical texts about God's judgement.

Whoever believes and is baptised will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned. Mk 16:16 NIV

Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. Jn 3:18 NIV

They imagine that everyone will end up in God's heaven at some point.

How would the believing Jews feel if they were to face Hitler in heaven one day? How could God be considered just in this case?

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. Jn 3:16–18 NIV

God loves us all, without exception and without conditions. We can never earn God's love, but we can accept or reject his grace and forgiveness.

Should you love yourself?

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Mt 11:28 NLT

God loves you and me. We have all gone wrong. We are all unworthy sinners, we need God's forgiveness. Without God's forgiveness, we must always strive to hide our shame and disguise our failures.

You and I have a longing for love, but we always doubt whether we can be lovable.

Many react with exaggerated self-centredness. Religious Christianity has therefore rejected all self-love as sin. Many strive to resist self-love. They try to love others, but not to love themselves.

But this does not work well.

We learn from social science that many patients visit a doctor, get a prescription, but they don't buy the medicine. Others buy the medicine but don’t take it. Then there are others who take the medicine but take it incorrectly, or forget to take it when they are in a hurry.

(Peterson, Jordan B.. 12 Rules For Life: An Antidote for Chaos. Kindle Edition.)

Why do we neglect our own health? Because of a lack of genuine, healthy self-love.
But social scientists have revealed an even more astonishing finding.

When they get a prescription from the vet, almost all people are very reliable and use the medicine just right.

Jesus tells us to love ourselves. But no! Really?

... ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’ … Mk 12:31 NLT

But many preachers have always claimed that we all love ourselves too much. We must therefore endeavour not to love ourselves.

And the very many people who despair and commit suicide, do they really love themselves?
So many people do not respect themselves, do not care for themselves, do not protect themselves.

Yes, there are people who seem to worship themselves, but there are also so many who hate or despise themselves.

I visited a church in Germany where the preacher was praying with longing for revival. He once asked God why the long-awaited revival had not yet come.
He told us that God had given him an amazing answer.

We are still waiting for revival because so many Christians do not love themselves.

I once had a problem because a pastor had arrogantly dominated me.

Again and again I thought how I should have resisted his domination. Anger and resentment kept surfacing in me. Then I repented each time. I prayed to God for forgiveness. I proclaimed my forgiveness for the pastor.

But a few days later, the anger resurfaced.

Then I gave up the fight. I simply told God:
``Dear God. You see my thoughts. What do you think about it?
The Holy Spirit answered immediately:
‘’You can't forgive the pastor because you can't forgive yourself. You should have resisted, and you failed. You have to forgive yourself for your failure.
Then I was set free.

It was a lack of self-respect. There is a God-given self-respect. This is an aspect of healthy self-love that Jesus is talking about.

Paul deals with the same topic.

He warns against extreme subservience, which is also an aspect of a lack of self-love.

In fact, you even put up with anyone who enslaves you or exploits you or takes advantage of you or puts on airs or slaps you in the face. 2 Co 11:20 NIV

Jesus also warns us against authoritarian preachers.

“But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers. Mt 23:8 NIV

Extreme submissiveness is terrible, but rebellion and selfishness are no better.
When a man visits a prostitute, he not only despises the woman, but also himself.

Don’t you realise that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 1 Co 6:19 NLT

Healthy self-love is also an antidote to drug addiction and pornography addiction.

You can only love yourself properly if you learn to experience the love of God, if you learn to value yourself as God values you.