Healing from Spiritual Abuse

 I was 24 years old and I was a lost soul. I somehow believed in Jesus, but I was torn by so many doubts. I sought help for my depression with a good therapist, but he couldn't eliminate my existential fears.  

I attended a church where I learnt a humanistic worldview, but I wasn't convinced in my heart.

I attended a yoga class, but I didn't find an eternal reality there.
I visited a fanatical sect and my confusion only got worse.

Traumatised, I finally sought help from my cousin, a loving, Bible-believing Christian.
I attended a church with her where I heard a powerful testimony from a preacher who had been persecuted for years in a communist prison and had remained faithful.

I was determined to believe in Jesus and the Bible. That was the beginning of my new life with God.

But not everything went smoothly. The leaders of this church were seemingly flawless like the apostle Paul, but unfortunately that was not the case.

The pastors wanted to tightly control everyone. I wasn't supposed to see my therapist anymore. I was supposed to fast and pray and fast and pray.

It was all too much for me and I broke down.

I was cast out as an unreconstructed sinner and I had a complete nervous breakdown.

But Jesus never rejected or condemned me. Jesus loves the weak and wounded sheep that some preachers despise and cast out.

If you want to understand this, you can find similar stories in the New Testament.

Jesus healed a man who was blind from birth. He gave his testimony but the Pharisees did not want to believe that Jesus had healed him, but the healed man would not give in. He dared to contradict the Pharisees and they excommunicated him from the Jewish community.

Jesus heard that they had thrown him out, and when he found him, he said, “Do you believe in the Son of Man?”

“Who is he, sir?” the man asked. “Tell me so that I may believe in him.”

Jesus said, “You have now seen him; in fact, he is the one speaking with you.”
Then the man said, “Lord, I believe,” and he worshipped him. Jn 9:35–38 NIV

In the following chapter, Jesus explains that he is the Good Shepherd who wants to save the misunderstood and rejected sheep.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.
“I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep. Jn 10:10–11 NASB95

No matter how people have abused you, you are no less loved by Jesus.

Jesus is speaking to you now.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Mt 11:28 NASB95