Don't Let Abuse Cripple You

 Joseph was his father Jacob's favourite son. Jacob spoiled him and gave him a splendid robe. This aroused the envy of his brothers and they hated him.

They wanted to kill him, but instead they sold him as a slave.

These men were the fathers of the twelve Hebrew tribes.

These tribes formed the chosen people of God, but their behaviour was anything but holy.
Joseph was prophetically gifted but unbearably proud and arrogant.

His brothers were hateful and cruel.   

We Christians read the history of the Jews in the Bible and we are often proud that we are supposedly better.

We read in the New Testament about the heroic faith of the apostles and the love and virtue of the first Christians, but not everything in the first churches was beautiful and good.

There were good but also evil church leaders.

Paul teaches us that we should not passively accept cruel treatment from preachers and leaders.

For you tolerate it if anyone enslaves you, anyone devours you, anyone takes advantage of you, anyone exalts himself, anyone hits you in the face. 2 Cor 11:20 NASB95

But surely there is no such brutal leadership these days. Yes, there is.

We often read terrible reports of Catholics who were sexually abused as children in the church.

In America, there are also many reports of sexual exploitation of young women in evangelical churches.

A Christian journalist in Australia has researched the stories of harassed wives of pastors. These women told how they were enslaved and often raped by their outwardly respectable husbands.

Jesus warned his apostles that they were not immune to hypocrisy either. We can all fail. Where can you find a Christian who has never been hurt by other Christians?

There are two tragic mistakes that we must avoid.
Some victims learn never to resist, to see themselves as inferior, to give up all hope.

When some husbands read in the Bible that their wives should submit, they demand slave like obedience. They don't allow access to a bank account. They always give orders and humiliate their wives all the time.

If the woman seeks help in the church, she is blamed because she is supposed to submit even more. There are women who put up with all this for years.

The other mistake is the strong reaction, whereby the injured victim escapes and then becomes an aggressive, bossy bully.

Joseph was the spoiled and proud son of Jacob. He was abducted by Arab slave traders and sold in Egypt. He suffered unjustly for years as a slave and then a prisoner, but he never gave up and never became bitter.

Joseph was finally freed from captivity. The strange prophetic dreams of his youth were astonishingly fulfilled. He became the head of the Egyptian government and then he was reconciled with his family.

Perhaps you have had to endure terrible experiences in churches, as I have myself. Please don't give up. Jesus was also persecuted by God's people. He understands your suffering and he loves you.

God has a way out for you, not unconditional submission, but not resentment and revenge either.

Of course this does not mean you cannot publicly call out for justice. Of course it is right to report rape to the police. Of course it is right to denounce abusive church leaders. Jesus and Paul publicly denounced bullies in pulpits.

‘Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you greatand mighty things, which you do not know.’ Jer 33:3 NASB95