Can Women Teach Men?

 Can women teach men? Can a woman teach a man? Can a wife teach her husband?

Smith Wigglesworth was an evangelist who healed the sick and raised the dead. He never went to school and he was illiterate until his wife taught him to read the Bible. 

Carl Benz constructed the first car but he lacked the confidence to test drive it. Two years later, his wife took it upon herself to drive the car from one German city to another.

In World War Two, a team of British women worked out how to defend convoys of ships against German submarines. Many seamen owed their lives to the lessons they learned from these women.

In the Bible, the prophetess Deborah governed Israel, sat in judgement in legal disputes and taught the ways of God to all the people. She was called and gifted by God to do this.

There are fundamentalist legalists today who use proof texts to give women even less freedom in the church than some women had in the Old Testament. 

This whole mindset is contradicted by Paul’s writings.

There is no longer Jew or Greek; there is no longer slave or free; there is no longer male and female, for all of you are one in Christ Jesus. Gal 3:28 NRSVue

Pursue love and strive for the spiritual gifts and especially that you may prophesy. 1 Cor 14:1 NRSVue

This was addressed equally to men and women. The proof of this is in the following verses.

Any man who prays or prophesies with something on his head shames his head, 
but any woman who prays or prophesies with her head unveiled shames her head—it is one and the same thing as having her head shaved. 1 Cor 11:4–5 NRSVue

Clearly women should prophesy if they are decently dressed according to the customs of the day. Otherwise the text makes no sense.

For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. Gal 5:1 NRSVue

The Prime Minister of Australia was a family friend who valued the advice of my grandmother. Many prominent men owe a part of their success to the advice of their mothers, wives, sisters or secretaries.

The cardinal rule of Christian love and fellowship is mutual submission.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NIV

This means that wives should submit to their husbands but husbands should also submit to their wives. This can be difficult to understand if you leave out the loving guidance of Jesus over both marriage partners. 

Mutual submission is not always easy. It cannot be taught with simple formulas. Every couple has to learn how to apply it. It takes time, effort and practice.

If a man lords it over his wife, he dishonours his wife but he also dishonours Jesus.

If a man is not willing to learn from his wife, he is very misguided and he will suffer the consequences. 

Jesus Wants You to be Free

 Jesus died to set you free.
Jesus died to save you from eternal death, to free you from despair and endless hopelessness, without God, without friendship, without comfort.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. Jn 3:16 NRSVue
 
Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Rom 8:1 NRSVue

Jesus died to free you from your twisted, selfish human nature.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 2 Cor 5:17 NKJV

Jesus died to free you from loneliness.

May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. 2 Cor 13:14 NIV

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. 1 Jn 1:7 NIV

Jesus died to free you from sickness.

… “He took our infirmities and bore our diseases.” Mt 8:17 NRSVue

Jesus died to free you from legalism.

Welcome those who are weak in faith but not for the purpose of quarreling over opinions. 
Some believe in eating anything, while the weak eat only vegetables. 
Those who eat must not despise those who abstain, and those who abstain must not pass judgment on those who eat, for God has welcomed them.

 Who are you to pass judgment on slaves of another? It is before their own lord that they stand or fall. And they will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make them stand. 
Some judge one day to be better than another, while others judge all days to be alike. Let all be fully convinced in their own minds.

 Those who observe the day, observe it for the Lord. Also those who eat, eat for the Lord, since they give thanks to God, while those who abstain, abstain for the Lord and give thanks to God.
Those who do not eat meat do so for the glory of the Lord, and they also give thanks to God. Rom 14:1–6 NRSVue

Jesus died to free us from authoritarian leadership.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NIV

Submission is mutual.

 You gladly put up with fools since you are so wise! 
In fact, you even put up with anyone who enslaves you or exploits you or takes advantage of you or puts on airs or slaps you in the face. 2 Cor 11:19–20 NIV

Here Paul teaches through the Holy Spirit that Christians have the right, even the duty, to resist arrogant, authoritarian, or cruel church leaders. 

God sacrificed Jesus to free women from the arrogant rule of men.

 The extreme subordination of women was not God's intention in creation. After the Fall, God sadly predicted that because of sin, women would be enslaved by men.

To the woman he said, “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labour you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.” Gen 3:16 NIV

But in the new covenant, women are free.

There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Gal 3:28 NIV

It is wonderful that Jesus wants to give us freedom, but we do not receive that freedom automatically.
 
There are people everywhere who do not believe in freedom, even in the church.

 There are many people who do not want to allow you to be free.

But Paul says:

For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. Gal 5:1 NRSVue

Mutual Submission in Action

 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. NIB Eph 5:21-22

Christian submission means first of all submission to God, to His word and to the promptings and leadings of His Spirit.
Secondly, Christians have to submit to earthly authority. What is the nature of this human submission in the church of Jesus Christ?

Here is a radical idea. The first and most important commandment concerning submission amongst Christians is that Christians should submit to one another in love and reverence for Christ.

That means that a husband must submit to his wife and she to him. after that comes the commandment for a wife to submit to her husband, within the context of a mutually submissive partnership.

What does it mean for a husband to submit to his wife?

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her Eph 5:25 NIV

Paul does not say a husband must lead or direct his wife as Christ leads and directs the church. Jesus is God to the church but a husband is not God to his wife.

Other relationships within the church should follow the same principle and pattern. A pastor must submit to a member in his congregation, and the member should submit also to his pastor. That means obedience to pastors and leaders must be in the context of a mutually submissive partnership between brothers.

The primary connection between a prophet, apostle or pastor and an “ordinary Christian” is one of brotherly equality. The secondary connection is one of leader and member but the authority aspect is secondary and is only valid in the context of brotherly co-membership of a community.

What does this mean in practice?

Firstly, a senior pastor should consult about church policy with fellow church members, those in the official leadership group and especially mature or wise believers outside the official leadership group.

When Paul wrote to the Corinthian church about church policy, he did not address his letter to a senior pastor, an executive committee or an exclusive board of elders but to “the church in Corinth.”

My father was a medical student during WW2. His father and older brothers fought and suffered in the war.

After the war, he became a psychiatrist treating war veterans. He read 70 books about Australian war history.

The siege of Tobruk took place from April to December 1941, during the Western Desert campaign. One Australian division was supplemented by British, Polish, Indian and Czechoslovakian troops, but they were besieged by a far stronger German force with German tanks. 

They withstood the siege for nearly 9 months and delayed the German advance towards Egypt and Israel.
The usually invincible German tanks repeatedly attacked. The Australian foot soldiers took refuge in deep trenches and let the tanks pass over. Then the Australians climbed out and attacked the tanks from behind.

When German tank commanders surrendered, they were amazed, because up till then they had been undefeated.

I told my father the Australian general was amazing to devise such tactics. My father replied at least some Australian generals were open to ideas from men of all ranks. This is mutual submission in action.

Loving Partnership in Christian Marriage

 How should husbands and wives treat each other?

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. Eph 5:21–22 NIV

Many Christians quote verse 22 alone, but verses 21 and 22 are two parts of one sentence in the Greek New Testament. The word “submit” only occurs in verse 21, not in verse 22.  

 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives,  …  to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. Eph 5:21–22 NIV

This does means husbands and wives should submit to one another. There is no other way to meaningfully understand this single sentence.

There is much debate about what it means for the husband to be the head of the wife but that is a topic for another time.

Paul says husbands must love their wives as Christ loves the church, but he does not say the husband must command, direct or control his wife as Christ rules over the church.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Eph 5:25 NIV

Bible teachers often ignore the fact that a husband and wife are fellow Christians and therefore the rules that govern relationships between all Christians must apply to Christian marriage.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. Jn 13:34 NIV

There are some overrated Bible teachers who teach male domination in marriage. They say a man must love his wife and a wife must respect her husband. Then they focus on wives respecting (and obeying) while they merely pay superficial lip service to husbands loving their wives. So much nonsense!

Jesus said the apostles must love each other. Was this only for apostles? Of course not. All Christians must love each other as Jesus loves us, husbands and wives included.

If the husband is the leader, which is sometimes appropriate, he should follow the teaching of Jesus about leadership.

Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them.
Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,
and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— Mt 20:25–27 NIV

Some leaders demand to be heard and obeyed, but good leaders listen and consider the thinking of others.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, Jas 1:19 NIV

Many, if not most husbands are not good at listening to their wives. We all need to improve in this regard.

But many teach that the husband should always be the leader, ideally a kind Christian leader. Careful observation of men and women should lead us to question this belief.

Some men are natural leaders and many others are born to be faithful followers. Likewise some women are natural leaders and many others are gifted to be followers.

The couple who led me to faith were my uncle and his wife. She was created and gifted to be a natural strong leader, and her husband was an introvert with the qualities of a good partner and a faithful follower.

My aunt loved and respected her husband and he loved and respected her leadership qualities.

Manipulative, Controlling Leadership

 It hurts when you see Christians in leadership and they use the same dishonest political tactics as unbelievers. I've often felt like I was being manipulated by Christian leaders, and I wasn't wrong to feel that way.

It hurts to be pressured into supporting Christian leaders who promote themselves and their party, faction or ministry more than justice and mercy.

Every time an election comes up, I feel stressed about the twisting and manipulation that goes on around me.

When I asked God about this, I believe the Holy Spirit gave me a very clear answer.
Politics is mostly about manipulation. It is what it is.

What does the Bible say about that?

There are leaders who want to hide their mistakes, or the sins of their colleagues.

For there is nothing hidden which will not be revealed, nor has anything been kept secret but that it should come to light. Mk 4:22 NKJV

There are leaders who demand unconditional submission.

The apostle Paul was a true and faithful leader. Paul himself condemned the practice of dictatorial leadership.

In fact, you even put up with anyone who enslaves you or exploits you or takes advantage of you or puts on airs or slaps you in the face. 2 Cor 11:20 NIV

Paul defines the basis for true Christian fellowship.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NIV

Some Christians might argue that this mutual submission should only apply to Christians of the same rank. But how did Jesus understand this truth?

The first Christian woman chosen by God to witness the resurrection was not an apostle, but Mary Magdalene. When she and other women told the fearful apostles that they had seen Jesus, they did not believe. How did Jesus react?

Later Jesus appeared to the Eleven as they were eating; he rebuked them for their lack of faith and their stubborn refusal to believe those who had seen him after he had risen. Mk 16:14 NIV

When a leader goes wrong, some Christians claim he was not chosen by God, but King Saul was chosen by God.

There are Christians who claim that you should never publicly criticise a chosen leader, but David openly accused Saul.

Suppose you have been abused, bullied and shunned by Christian leaders, pastors or politicians.

What does Jesus think about this?

In John 9, Jesus healed a blind man. When the man testified that Jesus had healed him, he was excommunicated by the religious leaders.

Jesus didn't just heal the man. He sought him out to help him when he had become a persecuted outcast.

Jesus heard that they had thrown him out, and when he found him, he said, “Do you believe in the Son of Man?”

“Who is he, sir?” the man asked. “Tell me so that I may believe in him.”

Jesus said, “You have now seen him; in fact, he is the one speaking with you.”

Then the man said, “Lord, I believe,” and he worshipped him. Jn 9:35–38 NIV

Are you being bullied or ostracised by religious leaders? Please don't blame Jesus. He wants to help you personally. The same religious leaders crucified Jesus, but he returned from the grave.

As a young Christian, I was excommunicated, but I learned that the cruel leaders were not the source of my salvation, but Jesus Himself.

The LORD builds up Jerusalem; he gathers the exiles of Israel.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Ps 147:2–3 NIV

Jesus gathered the outcasts of Israel and he also gathers the Christian outcasts today.

Where does your Calling Come From?

 There are so many who live tragically unfulfilled lives because they are dominated and constrained by other people's expectations.

There are women who have amazing gifts from God but are forced to submit in marriage.

Charles and Frances Hunter were pioneers in the healing ministry. They served God as partners.

Their daughter Joan was also gifted by God and called to serve with gifts of healing. When she was engaged early in her life, her fiancé said her ministry should be under his control after the wedding because he, as the husband, was the head. She immediately called off the engagement.

The husband is never the master of his wife, but her partner under God's rule.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NIV

If you have gifts of grace from God, you are responsible to God yourself.

There are churches and denominations where women are forced to play a passive or subordinate role. Many women in this situation have found a way out by never marrying and becoming missionaries in distant lands.

In the 19th century, the majority of missionaries in China were women. They mainly evangelised among Chinese women. Today, more than 75% of church leaders in China are women pastors.

Many women are frustrated and unfulfilled because of legalism and human traditions, but not only women.

How many men are gifted to serve as shepherds and preachers but are never allowed to marry in their denomination. So often we see how such men cannot bear life without a wife.

On the other hand, there are devoted Christians who marry because their church forces them to, and their marriage is a disaster.  

I read the story of a pastor. He was in a meeting with the board of his church. The church was having serious problems. Suddenly, the pastor stood up and shocked the elders.

I'm resigning. I only became a pastor because my mother wanted me to!

What is your calling? Who does your calling come from?

Discipleship and Mutual Submission

 Many Christians believe that the Christian church must be based on a strict chain of command, like an army. Leadership, direction and control must be based on submission to someone of superior rank.

Years ago, I transferred to a new church. I had spent years in a few different churches, and I was trying to understand God and the bible in the light of different approaches in different churches. 

I told my new pastor about the process I was struggling with, but his answer was disappointing.

He said God guides Christians primarily through the leadership. The trouble is, that the leaders of other churches also claimed to be hearing from God, but their teaching was often very different. Since they all believed in the same God, they must all be hearing very imperfectly.

The differences in doctrine were often not very great, but the mindsets were different, the priorities were different, the emphases were different, often very different.

Jesus said each believer must be led personally by God, by Himself. If your primary source of spiritual guidance is the teaching of the leaders of your church, you are a very immature believer, and if you stay that way, you have seriously gone astray.

My sheep hear my voice. I know them, and they follow me. Jn 10:27 NRSV

This does not mean that each believer should only hear directly from God and not learn from fellow believers. Jesus and the apostles taught the principle of mutual submission.

However, there are theologians today, and not only Roman Catholics, who believe that biblical submission is a one way process.

• The pastor tells you what to think, what to say and what to do, and you simply obey.

• The husband tells the wife what to do, and she just obeys.

• Then there is a slightly more moderate version of this authoritarianism, in which a married couple try to reach a joint decision, but if they disagree, the husband makes the decision and his wife must obey.

On the other hand, there are a number of texts in the NT which paint a completely different picture of Christian relationships.

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Php 2:3 NRSV

Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NRSV

You must understand this, my beloved: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger; Jas 1:19 NRSV

For who is greater, the one who is at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one at the table? But I am among you as one who serves. Lk 22:27 NRSV

But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones are tyrants over them.
It will not be so among you; but whoever wishes to be great among you must be your servant,
and whoever wishes to be first among you must be your slave;
just as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life a ransom for many.” Mt 20:25–28 NRSV

If we carefully consider these bible texts, we must draw the conclusion, that the hierarchical mindset is completely contrary to the teachings of Jesus in the New Testament.

But didn’t Jesus appoint apostles? Didn’t Paul appoint elders? Isn’t leadership important?

Of course, we need leadership, but true leaders lead. They do not control. They lift people up. They do not keep people down. 

Mutual Submission

As a new convert in an authoritarian cult like church, I learnt that submission to Christ meant that a Christian must have no freedom of choice, no personal preferences and no unique personality.

The death of the self was strongly emphasised. Love for anything other than God was idolatry.

But then I read in Genesis that God gave Adam the freedom to choose names for all the animals. God submitted to Adam's choices regarding the names of the animals.

Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. Ge 2:19 NIVUK84

When a husband loves his wife, he respects and honours her wisdom, gifts and abilities. The Apostle Paul writes that each of us should esteem others more highly than ourselves.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Php 2:3 NIVUK84

A husband who loves his wife will submit to her in those areas where she is wiser or more capable than he is. If a wife is much more spiritually mature than her husband, which is very often the case, he should be willing to value her spiritual guidance.

This leads my thoughts back to Ephesians 5:21.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NIVUK84

I also learned to question the rigid hierarchical culture of some churches.

Mutual submission means that the Senior Pastor should give children’s church leaders freedom to make decisions. 

A good pastor will also seek the advice of the elders, computer specialists, financial experts and prophetic people. 

A good pastor will also be willing to release church members into missions, and not only missions under his direction. 

A healthy marriage is a partnership. A healthy church is a team.