Old Age

 Retirement and old age can be a curse. Are you full or regrets over your failures and bad choices? You can look back at so many mistakes in your life. You wish you had made better decisions. What would have happened if …

You can look at the horrible things people had done that hurt you. You wish you had not allowed this or that person to dominate you and rob you of your independent thinking.

I saw my father in his eighties, as his health and his intellectual brilliance deteriorated. He went to bookshops and bought piles of books that he would never read. He so much wanted to keep thinking, although he knew his brain was ageing and his mind was fading and failing.

He progressively slipped into despair, just waiting to die and disappear into nothingness.
But old age can also be a time to rethink, to reconsider, to be open to another dimension.

As my father became helpless and bedridden, he could not read or watch television, but there was an openness to something he had pushed away from his mind when he was mentally and physically able.

My wife and I asked him if we could read the bible to him. He was happy to listen. We would read a chapter to him and ask him if that was enough. As time went by, he even asked to hear more.
Then there came a time when he was happy for us to pray for him.

Eventually he was 88 and my wife asked him if he would like to believe in Jesus and make peace with God. She prayed for him and he squeezed her hand. From that day he was never the same again. The black cloud of despair left him.

I talked to him about his mother and brother who were already in heaven. I told him they were waiting to see him again. Now he listened with positive expectation. Eventually my father died in peace at the age of 91.

Never stop praying for your loved ones. Many people in old age become more difficult, more irritable, more negative, but that does not have to be the end of the story.

Death can be a dreaded departure into darkness, or it can be a wonderful release into a better world with a good God.

I am now 75. Every year is a year closer to heaven. I am learning to let go of negative attitudes that I learned in past years. I am learning to be more tolerant, less critical, less judgemental, although that it still often a challenge.

Old age can be a time of hardening or a time of softening, a time of resignation, or a time of learning and teaching others with the wisdom of reflection.

To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, And a time to die; A time to plant, And a time to pluck what is planted; Eccesiastes 3:1–2 NKJV

Even Old People Need a Father. God is our Father.

 It is said that elderly people can become like children, weak, dependant and in need of support. I am nearly 76. My mother died at that age, but I am still mentally and physically active, and I expect to live past 80 at least.

When I turned 70, I started to think about the limited time I have left in this life. It didn’t frighten me. 

I had been reading a lot about near death experiences, in which people were clinically dead, talked to Jesus or even visited heaven. I am looking forward to the next life. Every year is a year closer to a much better life that never ends.

I am looking forward to seeing my parents and other believing friends and loved ones. I am looking forward to pursuing my passion for music and art.

It is wonderful not to have to go to work. I don’t have to comply with stupid bureaucratic procedures that contributed nothing to the effectiveness of my work. I don’t have to deal with fastidious managers and stressful deadlines. I don’t have to get up at 6 in the morning, deal with peak hour traffic, and keep working in the afternoon when I am getting tired.

 Some things are better, but some things are distressing.

I miss the social stimulation of working with students and colleagues. In the last few years I have also lost some dear friends. People get sick. People die. Even if they are believers and went to heaven, I miss their friendship.

Recently I was praying. I felt that I was still a young person in an ageing body. I no longer had parents to love me, although I was happy that they are in heaven. I felt like I needed a father. Although I am devoted to God, the fatherhood of God is something I have never fully emotionally connected to.

I lay in bed and repeated over and over.

“I need a father. God, you are my father.” Even though this was not an overwhelming feeling, it was a reaching out to my real heavenly Father. We all need a father, no matter how old we are.

A couple of days later, I was reading the psalms. I came across a familiar promise of God, and it was an answer from heaven to my prayer.

Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me. Ps 27:10 NIV

This verse took on a new meaning for me. I know Christians whose parents abused or deserted them, but that was not my experience. My parents cared for me long after they reached old age. They never abandoned me.

I did not grieve when they died, because both of them became believers on their death beds. I was relieved and happy they were safe in heaven.

But now I realise I need a father. And God spoke to me through psalm 27. God is my Father and he will never let me down.