As a new convert in an authoritarian cult like church, I learnt that submission to Christ meant that a Christian must have no freedom of choice, no personal preferences and no unique personality.
The death of the self was strongly emphasised. Love for anything other than God was idolatry.
But then I read in Genesis that God gave Adam the freedom to choose names for all the animals. God submitted to Adam's choices regarding the names of the animals.
Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. Ge 2:19 NIVUK84
When a husband loves his wife, he respects and honours her wisdom, gifts and abilities. The Apostle Paul writes that each of us should esteem others more highly than ourselves.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Php 2:3 NIVUK84
A husband who loves his wife will submit to her in those areas where she is wiser or more capable than he is. If a wife is much more spiritually mature than her husband, which is very often the case, he should be willing to value her spiritual guidance.
This leads my thoughts back to Ephesians 5:21.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Eph 5:21 NIVUK84
I also learned to question the rigid hierarchical culture of some churches.
Mutual submission means that the Senior Pastor should give children’s church leaders freedom to make decisions.
A good pastor will also seek the advice of the elders, computer specialists, financial experts and prophetic people.
A good pastor will also be willing to release church members into missions, and not only missions under his direction.
A healthy marriage is a partnership. A healthy church is a team.
